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ExperienceZone

Learn and grow through experiences

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January 2016

The more you do, the more you can do

Ten years ago, I discovered a truism that became one of my axioms in life: The more stuff I do, the more capable I become in learning new things plus get them done efficiently. Why’s that? Let’s check it out the ExperienceZone way.

Action is golden

I’ve got a deep believe: One reason why we’re on this planet is to express ourselves. This might by the quality of our gender specific energies more apply to men than to women. However, even latter find fulfillment in outgoing recreational activities and career development since the start of their emancipation.

Expression requires you to create an intention. This usually starts with emotions, i.e. the inner processes that move you internally and eventually cause external exhibition. There’re only two emotions: Love and fear. Both will trigger action. Former let’s you go after the things you want and latter step back from those you don’t want. Emotions are impregnated by thoughts. They match your perception of the outside world with your self-image. This contextualization takes place in split seconds and give birth to feelings. They’re the actual cause for external action. Hence, all inner processes are just the raw material for outer performance.

External behavior makes you change yourself and the world actively. Inner processes have an indirect impact on reality and are thus harder to control in their direction and intensity.

Generalist vs. Specialist?

Bottom line upfront: Calm down. Don’t worry about being too broad and narrow. Instead follow your heart. This might sound cheesy, yet applies to all areas of life. If you want to dig into the details and become an expert in rocket science, knock yourself out. If you feel drawn to many different things, do those! Life is a playground. There’s no one stopping you except for your fear of failure. Preferences change throughout life. So as physical attraction turns into love for your partner, fields of interests morph too. Embrace that everything changes every moment.

If you trust your heart though, you’ll never fail. Why’s that? It shows you your passions: The people you like to be with, the things you like to do or have and the places you want to go. This sparks motivation, which causes conscious outside actions and subconscious inside programming. Both ensure that your dreams become true eventually.

Bear one thing in mind: Your brain expands with every new experience. Your mind opens and your horizon widens. This enables you to take new perspectives, approaches to problem solving and decision making. So, embrace new experiences but don’t go astray your core values and plans in life.

What’s your game plan?

Let go of in- and external stressors. Make up your mind instead:

  1. What drives you? Why are you on this planet? Don’t tell me you want to eat, sleep and repeat it all over again. This way, you put yourself on par with less developed species and don’t use your divine gift as a human being. Tell me you want to be happy. Better but not sufficient though. Too fluffy. We all want to be happy. The question is: “What makes you happy?” Follow me here: Happiness is related to love and being loved. Others are only able to love you to the same extent you love yourself. Hence, you need to love your self more than anyone else first. Self-love is a function of self-confidence. Self-confidence results from knowing where you’re from, who you’re and what you want to do.
  2. Who are you? Time is a mental construct. Hard to explain and to believe alike. Change is inevitable. Your self transforms naturally. Do you want to own this process or be an observer? There’s no objective reality but only perception. Perception is in your hands. You decide every moment how you see yourself and the world. In hindsight, at present and forward looking. In other words: You can change your memories, your current self-image and future life deliberately. You can have that good childhood and live your dreams already. Again: There’s no one stopping you than your limiting beliefs. This is not esoteric pixie dust but based on recent scientific insights. The only question left is: Do you want to accept responsibility for your past, present and future?
  3. Who do you want to be? Shoot, this is about you. You’ve been granted a few decades on planet, so use them! Define your mission. Derive your aims in life. Think and act big. Let no one belittle your ambitions. Surround yourself with inspiring and empowering people. If you want to try new stuff, just do it! Most important is that you switch into action gear. Focus on your goals, yet allow yourself to step out of your comfort zone every now and then. Various experiences will make you a well rounded and thus interesting person assuming you keep your eyes on your objectives.

Take more deliberate decisions!

Life is a long sequence with highly frequent decisions. Every moment you’re making one. Large or small. Conscious or subconscious. I just decided to write about this topic (relatively large and conscious decision) and my fingers follow up on the keyboard (relatively small and subconscious decision). In other words: We’re deciding all the time. Even avoiding action is a decision. The quality of your life is a function of the quality of your decisions. So, how do you take better decisions? Let’s dive into it the ExperienceZone way.

We’re always on the run to…nowhere!

Success in our “developed” world is often the result of doing more in less time. Thus busyness can become an addiction. It means ‘having a valuable life’. We’re rewarded with money which allows us to buy stuff, which makes us feel even more valuable. No suprise that most of us engage in this rat race. Yet if we’re always down in the wheats, we’re not realigning to our mission. Also, we’re running the risk to become puppets and satisfy the expectations of others (incl. our partner, parents, children and friends) rather than living our own dreams. It’s like being on a fast-train, which destination we don’t know. We even don’t take time to look outside the window. We’re just too busy to make it run faster. The results are devastating: With the acceleration of our lives (mind that in the last 10 years our walking speed increased by 10%), burn-out rates as well as those of other stress related diseases skyrocket.

How do you escape the vicious circle?

  1. Make up your mind: Acknowledge that your’re part of the race. Admission is the first step towards change. Moreover, you want to feel an urge to shift gears. Just begin to write a no-to-do-list (documenting all activities, which you don’t want to engage in any longer) and/or craft your own eulogy (what other people should say about you when you’re dead). Those techniques enable you to take a step back and build the bridge to step #2.
  2. Define your mission: Why the heck are you on the planet? Well, you might respond that you want to become happy. Duh, everybody wants that. Yet only a few dig deeper and describe how they want to accomplish that. Countless ways lead to Rome. Lay your own path. Your unique reason for existence.
  3. Become an essentialist: A decision is a choice combined with an action plan. Once you select an alternative, you discard all others. They’re not part of your belief-system and thus reality anymore. In fact, those alternatives are only valid until you picked one. Afterwards all others vanish since reality changes with your decision. Hence you burn all bridges. This also allows you to focus on the things you want and relentlessly stop those activities, which don’t support your goals.
  4. Take a step back regularly: Our world is full of temptations. Even the smallest distraction might lead you astray. Realign to your mission every now and then. I’m reading latter daily and reviewing my aims in life on an annual basis. This brings me mentally back on track, so that I can follow up physically.
  5. Create and enjoy precious moments: Reasearch proves that accumulation of material goods don’t make us happier. Experiences do. Yet those need to be enjoyed. That requires time. Take it. You’re only a few decades on this planet. The older you get, the faster time runs. Design high-quality moments, which you’ll remember on your death bed. Everything else is just ambient noise.

 

 

 

 

Why do opposites attract?

We all know this phrase. We found it to be true in various situations. Seems like this truism serves us as a proxy for many phenomenons. I recently discovered that it particulary applies between partners. Hence, let’s uncover it the ExperienceZone way.

Everything in the universe is based on polarities

Day and night. Light and shadow. Heat and cold. All apperances are just expressions on different scales. Circadian rythms, brightness and temperature. One extreme cannot exist without the other. In fact, they seem to dance with another. Even more: One needs the other. Mind magnetismus. Likes reject and opposites attract.

Human relationships are energetic

Similar to magnetism, relationships are based on an exchange of energy as well. Latter is just on a another level, yet follows the same principle. Pushing and pulling forces. We call them male and female energy. Male energy is expressive, analytical and sequentially goal-oriented. Female energy is receptive, emotional and concurrently fulfillment-seeking.

Neutrality makes relationships fail

If one partner has an surplus in male energy and the other one a excess in female energy, their forces create tension. Tension leads to attraction between two human beings – physically, emotionally and spiritually. Everyone embodies both forms of energy. Traditionally, men are heavy in male energy and women have more female energy. However, in the late sixties, men cultivated their female energy and wore colorful clothes and long hair. In the course of emancipation, women increasingly focused on their career. This lead to an equalization of energies within individuals and therewith in relationships. The results are a lack of tension and thus attractiveness between partners. Divorces, single towns and low birth rates in the developed counties.

What can you do?

We all want to be appreciated. Actually being loved. Genetically, there’re two different keys to the kingdom depending on your gender.

If you’re a man, you usually want to cultivate your male energy. Why the heck are you on this planet? Define your mission. Then derive aims in life for each area. Afterwards pursue them as the top priority. If you’re or go into a relationship, you need to love your partner with all you got. Express your male energy physically instead of trying to understand her analytically. Yet always show integrity to your goals and your unbreakable will to be free. This is the strongest attractor for your wife.

In case you’re a woman, you are invited to cultivate your female energy. Live and breathe love. Be there for your partner. Also, follow your dreams yet accept your receptive side. Test his integrity continuously as a vibrant relationship fills your heart. Show your emotions and allow your man to let his feelings out. This behavior draws him to you.

Polar energies are gender independent. Even same-sex relationships require one to be active analytical and the other one to be passive emotional. Don’t force yourself into an energetic pattern you’re not feeling comfortable with. Rather accept that you might have found a wrong match, but realize that polarities always offer challenges and thus opportunities for growth for both sides. On a sidenote: We’re covering the necessary foundational energetic differences here. Of course, you need to have similarities with your partner to sustain a long term relationship.

A new year, a new life?

2016 is here. Reason enough to relaunch the experiencezone blog and provide you shots of insights on a regular basis. More importantly: What does a new year mean to you?

As above, so below

Hermes Trimegistus was right: Our world is made of fractal structures and processes. Those emerge when planets move around the sun and they can be found in the design of atoms. In fact, there’re a couple universal laws, which apply to us humans as part of the earthly community. Essentially, we’re knots of a gigantic net, in which every thing is connected.

Moreover, we’re powerful creators

Humans are equipped with three powerful minds: Brains, hearts and guts. Those trigger inner processes, such as emotions, thoughts and resulting feelings that impact the outside world through expectations. Likewise, the surroundings change our biochemical make-up by the experiences we make. Let’s conclude: Our inner world forms reality through expectations and vice versa via experiences.

Put this epiphany into practice

Fake it until you be it: Always think and speak big framed into an optimistic mindset. A new year is a new life. Spring (childhood), summer (early adulthood), fall (late adulthood), and winter (old age). Many overestimate what they can achieve in a day (which by the way is a 4-step-cycle as well) but underestimate what can be done in a year.

Take a step back and reflect

Then define your mission. Why the heck are you on this planet? Don’t sell yourself short by only satisfying your basic needs. You’re kings and queens, who deserve more than eating, sleeping and repeating. Take use of the few decades you’re granted to live on this planet. Derive your aims in life and follow through. Too many gyms become ghost towns in February. Too many dreams burst due to a lack of commitment. Develop new tiny habits, which twinkles merge into a shiny north star for others to follow.

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